What I can see-a Thanksgiving

February 22, 2011 at 3:51 PM | Posted in EYE believe, Giving thanks | Leave a comment
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It once again has been a while, hasn’t it?

I have been keeping busy with schoolwork and other such things, (mainly immersing myself in games that suck up too much time.)

My eyesight is still there and instead of lamenting what I am now unable to see I decided to be thankful for what I can see. I have started seeing a therapist and it has been wonderful. I have finally been able to say things that I have held for a long time and I feel cleansed every time I leave there. This last time I decided, seeing as it was a beautiful (fake) spring day, I would walk home. It is a lengthy walk but I am no stranger to long walks. This was my first walk in the area since we moved to this new apartment.

The sun was shining in a delightful way, not the harsh, cold orb it can be in the Winter. The temperature was eradicating the piles of snow everywhere. There was a cool breeze without a hint of ice on it and it was wonderful. As I walked and took in my surroundings I suddenly became humbled and thankful for all the marvelous things the Lady grants me to see on a daily basis. I am still able to see the glorious trees and without their leaves I can see their symmetry. Their branches harmoniously reaching out to the side and then to the sky as they go up the trunk so that every leaf once they come out will have access to the life-giving sun. The pine cones of the fir trees strewn around indiscriminately on the grass, the street, the sidewalk, hoping they might one day become as grand as the firs they came from.

The pools of now-liquid snow on the asphalt of a tennis court, slowly being taken back into the sky to be rained down on a different location on the globe.

Cracks in the sidewalk created by the earth shifting herself underneath the burden. Red-capped yellow fire hydrants placed like sentinels ready to protect the surrounding homes at a moments notice. Battered by the elements in their lifetime of servitude. Randomly strewn pieces of wrappers and garbage along the grass or in fences, whether dropped on purpose or taken from their receptacles by the wind.

Last year’s leaves hung on with determination on some trees. Withered, brown and making a soft papery sound in the wind. I could see their fragility as I walked by with their holes and tears. Their doomed hold will be over when the new buds push them out of the way when the true Spring comes.

Metal beasts of combustion moving along the river of asphalt containing fellow humans to some errand or another. The sunlight betrays the need for the beasts to meet clean water and soap. Salt left behind from the now gone snow crunching beneath the tires as they roll by.

The chain link fences shining in their dull weathered fashion showing someone who wants to keep others out or in while still allowing the Lady’s breath of air and gift of light move through freely. Spotting a happy, frolicking golden-brown dog and joining in the sentiment of joy for the day.

The other people taking advantage of the weather out in their driveways working on their cars or gardens. Students enjoying a break outside of the beauty school with their work aprons still on. The busy main street with cars whizzing by, slowing down to let this pedestrian cross unscathed.

I may not be able to see the details of everything in this beautiful world but I can still see the whole of things. Carl Sagan said, “The beauty of a living thing is not the atoms that go into it, but the way those atoms are put together.” Yes, I do miss seeing with my left eye the little scratches, the little patches of color, the shadows of texture, the crisp recognizable letters on a page. I can still see many of these things with my right eye, thankfully. However, I can still appreciate the whole thing without the tiny details. A tree’s shape is a beautiful thing to see, without concerning yourself with what the bark looks like.

It’s just as to why you love another person. Love is not based on the tiny hairs on an arm, the freckle on a shoulder, a wrinkle on a knuckle, or how many limbs you even have. You love the whole package, how all those tiny things have come together to be that person.

I will be sad when the sight finally leaves me, but I will have all these wonderful memories of everything the Lady has allowed me to see for so many years. Thank you.

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